Keith Dunne / Dad / Grandad
I must say that Keith/Dad would have been honoured and deeply humbled that so many of you have joined us today to celebrate the life of this very special man.
To most of us Keith was a friend, and that he was much loved by all became very evident over the past 3 months when many of you here today have visited him initially in St. Richards, then St Wilfrid’s and latterly Royal Bay Nursing Home.
All three provided the highest level of care, and to all who cared for Dad we offer you our heartfelt thanks that in the final months of his life you treated him with the care, love and dignity that have been the hallmarks of his life. A true gentleman who despite his pain and anguish over the past months showed tremendous courage and met the final challenges with humour and fantastic grace.
Dad, I was honoured that when the long nights became too much, you trusted me enough to call and allow me to offer you the opportunity to support and repay in some small way the unfaltering love and support you have shown to Mum, Paul, Trish & me every day of our lives. It is poignant that you chose the hymn “Here I am Lord” for your service some years ago, given the words are very relevant to the last weeks of your life.
Here I am, Lord. Is it I, Lord? I have heard you calling in the night, I will go Lord, if you lead me, I will hold your people in my heart.
Born in Reading during the war it is fair to say that Keith’s early years were less than ideal. However, as a devoted Son to Maud & Brother to Ann & Pete, Keith decided very early on that family was everything. Without a father figure in his early life he was lucky to have been taken under the wing of Father Collins, a true Christian, who offered Keith guidance, support and direction in his early years.
In the final months of his life he was able to take great comfort from his faith and was delighted to have been anointed and have the Viaticum administered by Father Tom & latterly a communion from Father Chris.
Nigel and I recently had a discussion with Father Tom about goodness and kindness, as we searched for a suitable reading for today’s service. Having reflected on that short chat and talking to Trish & Nige and a couple of my friends (Rob & Chris) we all had pretty much the same experience/story to share. As home owners we all sought advice from Dad over different aspects of DIY or maintenance on our homes.
Keith always shared his experience and offered great advice on what we should do to rectify the problems we had either created or inherited. Often before we embarked on any works, Keith, would pop round, his tools in a bucket. Same bucket but different tools dependant on the job or in Trish & Nigel’s emergency once arriving with drainage rods in hand ready to do the work for us.
For me even when I was living in Fareham. I remember on one occasion Dad was bricking up a casement window for us and he flicked cement on to my ex-wife’s pride and joy, a cream and pink Chinese rug…. Not only a good man but a very brave one!
Dad was without doubt a great builder, in many senses building houses was his passion. Despite his minimal education it was a great achievement that he not only succeeded but for many years flourished with his business partner Dave, running their gang. Keith was a great guy to work for, he always ensured his men were paid on time every time.
More than that, if any of his men were in need he was there for them not only when they worked for him but in the years afterwards. He turned his back on no-one.
Grandad decided to semi-retire in his mid-fifties. He bought a set of golf clubs and a little while later his white Renault 14 van, which he loved. We are told that during this phase of his life he was at his most content, driving his little white van around doing smallish building jobs around Bognor.
This new-found freedom enabled Grandad to find the time to enjoy us, his Grandsons Josh & Hobie. Grandma and Grandad looked after the us Mondays & Tuesdays every week whilst we were at school and the bond we had with Granddad was so strong.
Not to mention the always full biscuit tin and never-ending supply of Chocolate Ice Creams that continue to this day.
Grandad was an inspiration. It’s been lovely to hear from so many of you today how kind, caring and most definitely charming he was. This was also the case when we were with him – he was always so happy to see us, so keen to play with us, and so great at showing his love for us.
Grandad was unendingly generous. He had all the time in the world to share with us, his grandsons. I remember him coming in from odd jobs (sometimes earning money, sometimes brownie points with Grandma!) and the first thing he’d do is come and play with us; whether we wanted to wrestle, build things, play in the garden, or cheat Grandma out of her millions in Monopoly, Grandad would join and it would become so much more fun.
As Hobie and I have got older, that generosity has stretched to all manner of things. For years I’ve not been able to go to visit Grandma and Grandad without coming away with something. From socks to ironing boards, he would help in any way he thought he could, often offering help before we knew we needed it.
This has manifested in such a way that in these last few months he has entrusted me with his car, to help Naomi and our growing family. Grandad was the kindest, most generous, loving man whilst at the same time the strongest and most reliable man.
Family was everything to Dad and I know I speak on behalf of Paul and Trish that as kids we wanted for nothing, emotionally or materially. He & Mum worked hard to give us the best possible start in life and for that we are grateful. Whilst life was not easy he made it look so and instilled in us strong values – work hard play hard.
We did not always see eye to eye but having instilled in us to research fully before we took a decision, we often made sound judgements. Whilst not always in 100% agreement one thing was assured; he would always be there with his support and love. This continued until the day he died.
Never one to say I told you, so he would talk through the next stage, dust us down set us on our way. That applied also to Nigel, who married his little girl or Honey Child. Dad rightly regarded Nigel as a son, as we do a brother, and his joy at grandsons Josh & Hobie was as you heard earlier unparalleled.
As we all left home to begin our adult lives Mum and Dad returned to their roots of rock n roll. After all its how they first met. Dad loved this renewed phase in his life, whilst no longer able to quiff his hair, he more than made up for it by dressing the part.
You will be pleased to know Graham, he will meet his Mum again wearing the shoes that you spent 2 ½ hours shopping for in Nashville. Its great you are both wearing them today.
For 30 odd years Keith & Shirley have been travelling not just the UK but the World with their second family. It has been fantastic over the past months to hear so much laughter coming from Grandads room as those who visited reminisced about the fun days and nights drinking, dancing and just having a great time.
At one point the family thought it should start to sell tickets for “an Audience with Keith”. That he could forget his troubles and laugh at this toughest part of his life is a great testimony to Keith Dunne, Son, Brother, Uncle, Husband, Father, Grandfather, Business partner, friend and for many ladies’ a dance partner.
Keith/Dad/Grandad was a great man; generous, hardworking, honest, funny and fair who will be greatly missed by many of us.
Finally, whilst he was many things to all of us, for Mum he was her life-long partner, best friend, soul mate and wife of 58 years. On the morning Dad passed away Mum showed me a folded-up piece of paper that she had been reading and re-reading to herself. Mum wanted me to share this with you all as it sums up her feelings:
I am alone now, I know it’s true
There was a time when we were two
Those were the days when we would chat
Doing little jobs of this and that
We’d go to the shops and select our meals
But now I’m one, I know how it feels
To try and cook or have meals on wheels
The rooms are empty there’s not a sound
Sometimes I’m lost and wander round
To look for jobs that I can do
To bring back the days when we were two
When darkness falls, and the curtains are drawn
That’s when I feel the most forlorn
But I must be honest and tell the truth
I’m not quite alone and here’s the proof
Because beside me in his chair
He quietly waits our time to share
Keith said to me some time ago
Darling when the time comes for us to go
Let’s mix our ashes and be together
So, we can snuggle up forever
Sleep well my darling! x
